Scary Movie Round Up

Tomorrow is Halloween and the perfect time to watch a scary movie!

I was disappointed with the new Saw film (Saw VI). Sure it had gallons of blood but there was no suspense or characters I cared about. They tried to have a little twist on the ending but it was too little too late. The Saw franchise has become nothing more than a money maker for the studio now. The thing that made the first Saw film fantastic was the pacing, interesting characters and the unique situation (locked in a room and chained to the floor trying to escape).

I should also warn you to stay away from Rob Zombie's abortion...err "reinvention" of the Halloween franchise. The original Halloween (and a few of the sequels) were the perfect mix of suspense and horror and in my opinion some of the scariest movies out there. The new versions are white-trash death-metal stylized crap. Even the gore sucks. Avoid at all costs.

Luckily there are few on DVD that are worth renting this weekend:

I highly recommend Drag Me To Hell for your viewing pleasure. It's rare that you see something interesting and new with a supernatural kind of film (How many more Grudge rip-offs are there going to be?). It's a roller coaster ride of a movie, fast paced, full of unexpected surprises. It's also one of the best reviewed horror films in the past 5 years.

Trick r' Treat takes ghosts, cults, monsters, serial killers and combines them into five interwoven stories taking place on Halloween night. Its finally on DVD after selling out film festivals all over the world for the past two years. A clever movie that expertly adds humor without being cheesy.

Orphan is a great creepy kid movie. It's a little slow to start but the last half hour is CRAZY. There's are two "oh my god, I can't believe that just happened" moments at the end that are totally worth it.

There are a few movies coming out soon that may be promising. First is The Box with Cameron Diaz. Mysterious box arrives on doorstep, mystery and intrigue follow. The House of the Devil is getting great reviews for being a low-key 80's style horror-thriller. Sadly it's in limited release in the US and might not make it to Canada.

The only other film coming out that looks scary is Precious but that's mostly for Mo'Nique playing an abusive crack head and for Mariah Carey not wearing make up.

Does anyone else have recommendations for Halloween viewing? Anyone see Paranormal Activity?

I need a little trust, before I let you rape me...

Call me old fashion, but I like to know a person before I do anything sexual with them. There's no thrilling sensation in meeting a stranger, fucking them bareback and then going off to the next one. In fact, the only sensation is a burning one and that requires a quick visit to the kind nurse at the Hassle Free to get rid of it.

So my craigslist posting of the week belongs to this one.



I just don't get it. If you want to get raped, then go to prison. Or dress up like a girl and hit up a frat party on a Sat. nite. Or if you want to get 'safe raped' or aka fucked hard and nasty by your mate, then find one, gain some trust, and then go at it.

I'm tempted to write this person and discover why they feel the need to be degraded, but that's personal choice and I'm all for it. I guess my concern is the type of people that one attracts with such an ad.

My first complaint is the gun. I can do role play, but I don't believe in the use of hand guns, and certainly not as a fantasy. Guns are a reality, but they scare me. Perhaps a dildo shaped gun with a longggg pistol, but that's it. :P

My second complaint is the lack of recruiting 'nice guys that just like to pretend.' I feel it's important to send out to the universe exactly what you want. If you're not specific, you end up with a replication of your ex, but just with a better job, and then you're still unhappy. Oh my, that was a tangent.

Back on track with complaint #3, what's the feasibility of being able to arrange with a total stranger a kidnapping off the street without attracting public attention? I can work out an arrangement with you sneaking into my backyard, that's fine. But for a realistic kidnapping, people need to hear screams for help and see me knocking you unconscious. This should result in 911 calls for all around us. If it doesn't, then I've failed and I won't be in the mood to now rape-fuck you.

Finally, complaint #4, I sincerely doubt that this is the guy's picture in the posting. In fact, he mentions nothing about his age, stats, etc. He could be simply doing what I occasionally do, which is write fake postings for the mere fascination to see who responds. :)

All in all friends, I encourage the use of creativity in the bedroom. Nothing is more dry than humping your lover in your bed 2-3 times a day for years on end. One needs to take advantage of the shower, the balcony, the chairs, counter tops, floors, elevators, closets, etc. Never shy away from a sexual request by your partner, cuz it just means that they'll be thinking about that fantasy while you're enjoying the reality of another lame fuck.

Play safe, play often, play nice!