I think it was last Monday, when I took the plunge into the personal profile realm again. A week later, I'm done.I don't know how people stay on these things for weeks, months and even years. Maybe it's odd timing, but I'm pretty sure the people that were on these sites many a years ago - still are.
I took a different route this time around. Back in July, I was freshly out of a long term relationship and knew exactly what I wanted. I did a real lengthy-ish paragraph of precisely who this person was and wasn't going to accept any substitutes.
I went on a few dates, landed a pretty solid guy and made another really good friend out of the process. Unfortunately, 3 months in, I neglected my studies for the guy and then told the guy it had to end, so I could focus back on the studies. I'm not going to live with myself, if I let myself get 60s, so I can spend time with a dude. Tangent: After ending the relationship, I did pull myself up into the 80s for all 4 of my classes. GOOOOOOOO ME!
After ending that one, I told myself that I would wait until April. No longer did I want to hurt somebody, when I'm obviously too busy to focus on the time/effort that a relationship needs.
All of a sudden it's the end of January, I have 4 days off in a week (due to working 8, then 6 days in a row). I miss the feel and excitement of exploring a new relationship, meeting new people, and I dive into profile site land again.
Me in profile site land is kinda sad and scary though. I literally check the profile WAY too many times and I can, cuz I'm off and do all my schooling via the internet. I hit refresh after I send a message to await the msg that must be returned. I get excited when it says 'new message' and quickly check. I really enjoy the feature of 'viewed me' on one particularly site, cuz it's fun to see who's taken the time to click on your face.
A week later, I'm over it. The initial excitement has lost its lustre. I kinda took the passive route this time. Last time, I was a messaging whore. If I was into you, I wrote you, let you know, and then went from there. This time, I believe I said 'make the first move, I'll go from there.' I was slightly passive aggressive as I'd favourite some people who I was really into. ;)
Not sure if I'm just bored of the profile sites or just really happy with the few people that I've connected with. I could probably say that each one could be a potential mate or hopefully at least a friend. I don't understand why some people can't transfer feelings of 'please be mine' to 'okay, I can settle for a friend.' Would you rather have no contact or at least still have that person in your life? In most cases, a friendship will give you WAY more happy than a relationship ever will.
For now, the profile will stay up, cuz I think it deletes all your messages and it'd be mean, if some people don't get my replies to their messages. Let's say...Wednesday is take down day!
1 comment:
I hate online profile dating sites.
But I'm desperate, and who has time to go out and meet people these days?
hard enough as it is being a gay man.
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