My Trio of Mentors

Thus far in my life, I have had a trio of incredible mentors that have helped shaped me both professionally and personally.

All of them share similar qualities, but are also each very unique in their own way. 

My very first mentor has definitely been my Mom.  I wouldn't dare to call her Mother, as she hates this term.  Mom or Mommy, it is.   My Mom is probably the most generous individual that you will ever meet.  I have no idea how she finds the energy to get through each day.  She spends 12-16 hours a day working, raised a family of 3 children, supports friends, cares for my nephew and takes care of my ailing grandma and step grandfather. 

I'm trying to think of the last time that she's ever had a complaint about all that she does.  I can't.  My Mom's selflessness and workaholic spirit is something that I try my best to emulate.  When people think that I do a lot by working full time, going to school full time, doing the art projects, it doesn't really seem that much to me.  My Mom would work all day, come home and take her kids to dance lessons, swimming lessons, drama class, sport practices/games, and then return home to work until the early morning.  My Mom has also taught me the importance of family.  While you may not always like those that you're related to, you do have to love them.  We are also there to support one another, even if we don't always agree with the decision being made. 

In my mid teens, I came across my next mentor while working at summer camp.  She has remained My Boss ever since and we have a decade long working relationship that continues to get stronger each year.  She has literally seen me go from a quiet shy teenager to whomever you perceive me to be today.  She taught me that once you find your passion to pursue it full throttle.  She wakes up every day thrilled to go to work and has encouraged me to do the same.  Once, I lose the passion, it's time to move on and out. 

The way that I deal with customers is thanks to her.  We deal with a lot of complaints every day and she taught me long ago a very valuable lesson. You have two choices: laugh about it or let it bring you down.  We choose to laugh.  She has taught me that you need to be flexible to get through life.  You can plan, re-plan, have back up plans, but sometimes shit just happens.  You either deal with it or fall apart.  As you can see, My Boss likes to put things into simple categories of either see it positively or negatively. 

She believes very strongly in being yourself and shaping your job to fit this.  She has allowed me to alter my position, so that I'm still doing the core parts of the job, but have heavily expanded it to allow me to learn more, utilize my strengths and grow as a professional.  She has literally guided me and pushed me into doing things that I was very uncomfortable with, but that she knew that I would succeed at.

Finally, I have the Artist Mentor.  This individual I owe pretty much everything to who I am as an artist today.  We met 3 years ago as I happened to respond to a posting for a queer youth arts group.  Instantly, I connected well with her.  She is a positive supportive spirit, who allows you to develop as you please, but with a lot of input, feedback, and guidance towards the right direction.  What I really enjoy about her is that she is constantly challenging herself as an artist. 

Plus, she's an amazing facilitator.  It's a rare skill for somebody to be able to do both.  I remember first watching her perform after working on a group arts project and being like 'Awesome, she walks the talk.'  I had the opportunity to work closely with her on my first one person show.  That piece would never have been what it was without her continued guidance and support.  We never argued once, but I recall many great discussions around the pieces that were being created.  She will offer her advice, you're allowed to dialogue back, and then you go from there.  Since that experience, she's been a sounding board and consistent inspiration for the projects that I chose to work on and themes that I explore.  From her, I've learned that the greatest art that one can create has great truth to it. 

I have been extremely lucky to be surrounded by so many wonderful individuals, these three are just the key mentors thus far.

How about you?  Who has helped you?

Politics vs. Arts

Yes, that would be Abe Lincoln receiving some fellatio from a pretty gal. It's part of a 2006 series called 'Join or Die.' You can view Justine Lai having sex with many other American Presidents here.

While I'm sure many opposed her graphic images with such 'esteemed men', it got me to thinking about the way that politics and arts can be intrinsically connected to one another.

I think the exhibit is pretty genius, we tend to think of Presidents as being very serious and forget that they're human and obviously fuck. I'm sure we all remember how Clinton's approval rating was reported to have gone up during the whole debacle over his Lewinsky times in the oval office. This exhibit reminds us that there's the public side of somebody and the personal side.

Earlier this week, there was (imho) the stupidest uproar over a billboard in British Columbia for Coors Light that declares that it is 'Colder than most people in Toronto.' Do I agree with the statement? No. Do I care. Nope TIMES INFINITY!!! Stick and stones may break your bones, but names will never hurt you. I learned that when I was 4 and yet, we have grown ups screaming FOUL over it. The worse part is that you've got the media covering it, likes it's a big deal and then the billboard is then taken down. Why? It's getting you publicity and in my book, any publicity is good publicity.

Oh wait, we're now in this ridiculous world of facebook/twitter. Where we count somebody joining a group called 'I hate Coors' as being a legit pissed off customer. Nope, it's simply somebody willing to click 'join this group' button. That's all it takes. Just a click and you've voted your solitarity. One used to have to put pen to paper, make a phone call, or march in the streets to protest. But really..who does that?? That's tiring.

Really all that happened was that the ad was proven correct. We truly are cold Torontonians, as we lack a sense of humour and can't just accept a little coastal ribbing to sell a few beers.

A few weeks ago for Caribana, the queer community seemed to delight in joy at stopping Elephant Man from performing over his homophobic lyrics. My real disappointment was that there was no engagement into dialogue with the artist. We banned him. Big whoop. He'll sing in another venue. Why not discuss the issue with him? Maybe he'll see US as BEING less OPPRESSIVE. But no, we sent our e-mails, updated our fbook statuses and declared victory. Has there been any link between such lyrics and actual hate? I'm pretty sure Ice-T is on a mainstream show and even more ironic playing a cop and he's the guy singing Cop Killer. Why aren't we shutting him down?

Now to shamelessly self promote... On Monday, I'm happy to be able to present a show called Hard & Able: celebrating queer disability. You'll find that most of my works like to combine some sort of social issue into a creative piece. Some times, it's misjudged (Shoot A Load, Not Yourself) and other times, it's seen as it is (Chair fucker). The hope with my pieces is that hopefully it acts as a catalyst towards civil discussion. Which is what I think all art should engage you to do.

While I certainly encourage artists to continue to mix politics with their art. I am going to have to plead with art recipients (a.k.a. the audience) from jumping to over politicize their reactions so quickly. :)

Out of the Closet! - Dream Girl!

Like any good writer, I keep a bag of all my old notebooks, ideas written on scrap paper and articles of inspiration that holds over 10 years of me in it. I haven't been through this bag in forever and only did this morning, cuz I'm missing 2 sheets of paper holding my latest 'masterpieces' on them. :(

It was while going through this bag that I realized that it's only in the last 2-3 years that a lot of my pieces have had a chance to see the light of day. My 2nd realization is that I wrote a lot of crap 10 years ago.

I present piece #1 from Letsbevain's new 'Out of the Closet' series, where shitty pieces that have long been hidden away will finally be revealed. :)

"Dream Girl" - March 22/98 - unedited
Verse #1
Lying in my bed
I'm thinking about her
The way she looks
The way that she smiles
And I'm wishing, I'm dreaming
That she will be mine.

Chorus:
Dreaming about my dream girl again
Wondering if she's even real
Thinking about all the great times
We could have
If I knew where she was...
Dreaming about my dream girl

Verse 2:
I've spent many nights, just lying here
Thinking about you
I picture you and me
Hand in hand
Laughing uncontrollably

Chorus

Verse 3:
If I knew where, I would go there
Doesn't matter how long it would take
I would go anywhere for you
I would do anything for you
Tell me when, I'll be there

Chorus

Verse 4:
Falling asleep again
Hoping to dream about you
Cause in my dreams
We are always together
Always happy, nothing can go wrong,
Nothing can go wrong!



-Now it's your turn to post your awful works of art. :)

Unrealistic Land Presents: Bfs, Apts & Arts...

Last week in unrealistic land, we learned about my new unrealistic boyfriend. This week's adventures continue along this path and my dream of a new place and artistic plans.

My unrealistic bf and I broke some rules this week and saw each other face to face for the first time in a month via the mystical powers of skype. Late night decisions are always regrettable. It was a brief encounter, but good to put a face to a fantasy. ;)

He's accepted his position in Vancouver and we've made unrealistic plans for him to come to Toronto this January and then plans for me to fly out to Vancouver at some point. We'll be using his frequent flyer points, 'cuz in this unrealistic fantasy, he's got loads of them.

In other unrealistic news, I'm searching for the perfect place for January for myself. It's about time that I flap my wings away from the parentals again and venture into this new space. This new place will have ensuite laundry, fitness centre, indoor pool and of course, be cockroach free. It comes for the unrealistic price of under $1000 and this include indoor parking and all utilities (including A/C). On top of it, most of the tenants are insightful and cute. Weekly gatherings are held where we all walk around in our latest purchased cute underwear and discuss the meaning of life and the pursuit of happiness. As well, my cute next door neighbour will be a vegetarian chef who is more than willing to cook for me daily and teach me how to make the dishes myself. Finally, upon hearing the news that I'm avid yoga fan, the management board drops my rental fee in exchange for a monthly yoga class that I run. I offer up to run it nude and my rent magically disappears.

Finally, I've been in unrealistically lengthy discussions with fellow artists about the creation and continuation of some art projects. A highly regarded festival has contacted my collective about putting together a dazzling 45 minute presentation. They are offering unrealistic payment in exchange for this extravaganza. As well, my online venture is expanding. With a hit online show, it's time to branch out into other creative endeavours to expand its reach. Unrealistically, these promos will be created this week and then hit the viral market for everybody's viewing. The show will jump from its 12-16 viewership weekly to hundreds before our very eyes. Our new online blog (that u're presently reading) has hit a fantastic start, but thousands will recognize its magnificence within days. Other projects are lined up of the personal nature, but it'd be too much for you to handle.

Well fellows, we have come to the end of another edition of unrealistic land. What's been going on in your fantasy realm this week? Big plans for the upcoming week? I've set an unrealistic challenge to limit myself to 30 min. of internet time until next Sunday. Let's see if such a challenge can be done.