Hey Roman. Rape = Jail!

(The following is an open letter to Roman Polanski.)

Dear Roman,

First off, I apologize if you think that I should refer to as Mr. Polanski.  But I save such respect for those that deserve it.  As I think of you as scum, I will refer to you as Roman.  Not even Ro, as that would mean that we were on good enough terms to get to nickname status.  I won't even call you Supreme Douche as I refer to you in private.  Let's keep it cordial at Roman.  You may refer to me as, Awesome.

I have been reading in the news about your recent detainment.  It must be hard for you.  You probably thought the only place that you weren't safe was the US.  Surprise!  After all these years, they finally caught you.

I recall the Hollywood uproar a few short years ago, when you couldn't pick up your Oscar in person.  What a pity.  But you know, that was your choice.  You could've come home, picked up your Oscar and then been rightfully detained.

You see Roman, *coughs* Supreme Douche *coughs, the math is pretty simple.  When you have sex with a 13 year old girl that makes you a pedofile.   Pedofiles go to jail in the US and many other places around the world with appropriate child protection laws.

You seem to think that being an artist means that you're above the law.  That's dumb.  You were smart and disappeared out of the spotlight.  I guess Michael Jackson could've learned a lesson from you.  Disappear, do a few projects here and there, and you can get away with it.  But you see there's a vast difference between you and MJ.  MJ never admitted guilt.  Nor was he probably ever dickin' those boys.

Only someone who is truly corrupt would admit guilt and then run off like a scared little boy who got caught with his pants down.  I fear that because you got away with it once that you have continued your sexual escapades with children.  Yet, you probably learned from your previous mistakes and have found better ways to get away with it.

I think you should fly to the US, face your sentence (let's face it, it'll be minimal), and then move on with your life.  I'll even reduce your secret name to Minor Douche, if you do.

Sincerely,
Jay