My decade in review...

It's officially a new decade and with that comes a reflection on the last one.

Personally, this last decade saw me fall in love for the first time and then again and once more.  I learned what it's like to be the 'other lover' and both the cheater and cheatee.  Never one for the casual, these loves took up more than 6 years of the last 10 years.  I most definitely went with the 'projects.'  The one's that I felt could be saved only to learn that only they can 'save' themselves.  These last 18 months were spent figuring out if monogamy is what I want or if bed hopping would be sufficient.  I think my actions during this last month have cemented that for the next decade, I want to seek substantial loves.  While it may mean living without constant sexual shared gratification, it'll leave my mind and spirit in tact.

As for friends, I really only communicate with one friend that I met prior to this decade.  I left high school a year early due to emotional circumstances.  Plus, I tend to attract those with an adventurous spirit and quickly found my HS posse in all different parts of the world.  I found one of my best friends at the earlier part of this decade, lived w/ her for 3 years, and continue to be grateful for her friendship and love.  Recent years, I've made some really good friends who taught me that one can be queer and not sleep w/ their friends.  My early 20's taught me that to be friends w/ queers means that you have slept with them.  I'm friends with only one of those.  Most of all, I learned that friends are worthwhile and can be drama free.  No longer, do I attract or accept those that cause me harm, bring negativity into my life, or ask more of me than I of them. 

Family - I feel much more connected to them in the latter part of this decade.  The glue would be my nephew.  It's amazing what one individual can do to a group.  Pre-nephew the family was all going their separate ways and I am not sure what would have happened without him.  His early struggles found us each relying on each for strength and support.  His successes found us delighting in seeing that true strength is watching a premature baby fight minute to minute to survive.  With each milestone, it's as if we're each coming closer together.  We're far from perfect, still have to let go of much of the past, but I feel much more connected to both my immediate and extended family.

Professionally, this last decade has been my most successful.  While a majority of my friends seem to be still trying to find their professional footing, I lucked out and found great success.  Actually, I celebrated a decade of working for the same organization this year.  I came and went throughout this time, but was always attached to them.  I am lucky enough to have found a place where I'm consistently supported, forced to grow, and make a good salary.  It is now after a decade that I'm considering a career move, but this is only due to having such a strong foundation for so long.

Finally, this last decade saw a return to the arts for me.  I started the decade behind the scenes with a potential career in stage management.  Only to decide that I needed to be back on the stage.  The belief of an uncle had me performing drag (something I never had considered) in a show that was heralded the best of the year in its first run and then the worst of the fringe in another year (welcome to showbiz!).  A reply to an ad connected me with an arts program that completely changed my artistic focus.  This one reply led to 2 years of artistic exploration and encouragement that allowed me to develop as an artist.  It allowed me to fully realize that acting in dead men's plays was of no interest to me.  It was creating 5 min. silly sexual spoken pieces to beats that I enjoyed.  From there, it was fully realizing my potential as an artist and empowering others that shared commonalities that was important (re: hard & able).  This is one area that I am particularly excited about exploring over the next decade.

A ton more happened over this last decade.  My fun exploring Canada both in a household of 11 youth and then solo, my constant moves ('rents to 398 main to 'rents to Eastdale to 'rents to Greg's place to 'rents to Condo Vicora), and my own self battles with self esteem & self love. 

It's difficult to see how this next decade will compare to this last one.  This last one saw so many firsts: love, job w/ benefits, car, lease, event production, etc.  The decade of my youth has come and gone and now I look forward to the decade of becoming a full fledged adult...no clue what that means.