Tuesday, November 3, 2009

"Good Until Further Notice"

In my pursuit of entertaining my own random thoughts, I would like to write about relationships today and why we just fucking get ourselves into it, when we all know that it has an expiration date, a "good until further notice" end? It might be because, to borrow Freud's term, it gives us a sort of "oceanic feeling"...but does it really? Do relationships really bring us happiness, or do they bring us problems, more than what we had to begin with? I would like to argue that it is the latter that happens, rather than the former. I am going to prove this by adopting some points in Laura Kipnis' book Against Love: A Polemic.

The one thing that struck me about this book is when she says, "falling in love means committing to commitment [itself]" (p.57). This essentially means that we're not only committing ourselves to the other person(s) but also, we need to commit on a number of emotional baggage, which is harder (as most of you would know) than it seems. Committing to commitment means that we are also constantly anxious about the possible end of the relationship and the fear of pain and suffering that will eventually follow that end. "Good until further notice" is the dictum of every relationship (at least for us post-modernists who think that "'till death do us part"
is now part of an archaic past): that it always has an inevitable end, which is either planned or unplanned; but essentially, we all have a claim to a right to exit when the relationship no longer works for us. Therefore, why do have to go through this whole committing to someone and committing to commitment phase if we know in the back of our minds that it will eventually end anyways? Can't we just have fun sans the commitment part? On that note, maybe I'll just stick to Spam since it's good until the end of the world...I could always eat it anytime I want. I'm Filipino afterall :P (if you're wondering what's the connection between Spam and being Filipino, see: SPAM and Fast-food "Glocalization" in the Philippines by Ty Matejowsky...or just ask one of your Filipino friends LOL!)

No comments: